could you imagine being a giraffe and having to throw up
(via jiggalopuff)
In the Sims, you don’t say, “I love you.” You say, “Habadu bashubi,” which roughly translates to, “I cannot move because there is furniture in the way.” I think that’s absolutely beautiful.
(via obliviateyourface)
i never realize how much i swear until i’m in a situation where i can’t
(via obliviateyourface)
your bra strap is showing please hide it because it is suggestive. also your boobs are producing lumps in your shirt please hide them. your butt is in the same situation please get rid of it. also your legs. your arms. your face.
(via jiggalopuff)
it makes me so uncomfortable when people swear at their parents like i would get straight up beaten if i told my mom to shut the fuck up
(via jiggalopuff)
hey mum my gang is coming over tonight can you prepare some fun snacks
(via jiggalopuff)
if caterpillars are able to sleep for a long time and come out prettier why cant i
who am i shaving for
(via obliviateyourface)
a Christian pizza parlor named Jesus Crust
(via obliviateyourface)
wish i was witty and cute but instead im sarcastic and annoying
(via wank-r)
are you a red light bc stop
